After being screamed at by my toddler for an hour and eventually losing it and screaming back, I utter that familiar phrase in my head of “what am I doing wrong?”. When the baby is screaming, won’t feed, won’t burp and won’t be comforted I hear that little voice say “what am I doing wrong?”. When child A is grunting at me and not talking and starts hitting himself or child B is again refusing to eat any solid food those words start ringing in my ears of “what am I doing wrong?”.
There have been a few times when child A has told me I’m a bad mummy. There have also been many occasions when he’s told me I’m a gorgeous mummy and he loves me yet I believe the negative much more.
Why is it that I have no confidence at all in my parenting and I constantly feel I’m doing it all wrong? My children are happy and healthy and child A for the most part is incredibly polite and intelligent. So why don’t I believe people when they tell me I’m doing a great job. I feel I constantly have to justify every decision I make and even when I do, that everyone is judging me and thinking I did it wrong.
One day I might believe I am a good mummy but at the moment I feel that any good points of my children is down to them and all the bad ones are because of me.